My Rising Senior

I didn't snap a picture. I didn't think of it. He was so handsome in his black pants, white shirt, black tie and black v-neck sweater. Today is his last day of his junior year. When I pick him up at 2:30 he will be a rising senior.

I can't believe it.

I just began writing when he began his junior year and here we are. Time marching on. I have met so many wonderful people along the way but still I'm filled with emotion today.

I sat on his bed this morning and realized how grown-up he really is. He doesn't need his mommy so much any more. Though, I do think he still enjoys her (at times, when I'm not nagging or making him nuts--which is probably most times).

But I pause today for many reasons. I usually look so forward to summer. Can't wait for the freedom of endless schedules, homework and pressure. I love summer. But this year will be different. Very different. I know that in every fiber of my being. This summer will whip by in the blink of an eye. This summer Kyle will attend Boys State, Fencing Nationals and continue studying for the evil SAT's. He will also write his essay for his common application.

Already my heart is fluttering. What happened to days of endless relaxation? What happened to "What do you want to do today, boys? I dunno, Mom, what about you?"

It has been an interesting school year I'll give you that. There were highs and there were lows. And you got to read all about them right here on my blog.

The biggest high in respect to Kyle was spending the week in Los Angeles with him. It was great to show him my hometown and we had a blast together.

Funny, the lowest low was during that same week. He received his SAT scores early one morning when we were in LA and he was disappointed in his score. They just weren't good enough for him. I could literally feel all the stress in my young son's body. It scared me. He has always handled stress so well. But this year was difficult for him.

I am proud of Kyle and I do love being part of his life. He is witty and enthusiastic, helpful (when he wants to be) and kind.

I've done my job. Now what?

Of course I'll be there to support him. And I know he will need my support. But it is time I get out of his way and I'm not sure how. I've learned a lot this year so I have a bit more of an idea of what my boundaries need to be in respect to mothering him.

I love him like only a mother loves her sons! "Snap out of it," wise words from MOONSTRUCK will become my mantra. "Snap out of it!"

I'll try and remember to bring my camera when I pick him up. I need to document this important day. It feels huge. Monumental. Happy.

I'm not sad. That's partly because I have found all of you.